Nightman Listens To – Talking Heads – Speaking In Tongues (Top 1000 Albums Series)!

Greetings, Glancers! Lets keep this run of first time listens going. I say first time listens, but I have a feeling I’ve heard this before, or most of it. Or at the very least it has been on in the background or people have tried to make me enjoy it and failed. It could be this album or it could be another by Talking Heads. In many ways I should like Talking Heads, as they have inspired bands I do like and people say they have a similar sense of humour and lyrical style as I have/had. The songs I’ve heard have never been more then meh for me, and most less than that. I don’t like the vocals and I don’t like the sub Shakin’ Stevens stage presence.

What Do I Know About Talking Heads: Led by David Byrne, I always thought they were English when I was younger, only later finding out they were American. They merged punk and pop and New Wave 80s stuff and always felt like an offshoot of New Order to me. I’ve never heard anything by them which sounded like punk, whatever people made me listen to was always dancey or quirky or poppy. I know most critics and serious music fans like them, so I’m in the minority. Or I just haven’t been converted yet – we’ll see.

What Do I Know About Speaking In Tongues: Nothing concrete. I know it reviewed well and I have heard the name. I may have heard some songs from it or the whole album in passing, but if I don’t remember it it didn’t make an impact. Looking at the track-list – no bells a-ringing, my first thought is ‘how dare you have only 9 songs – only metal bands can have 9 songs on an album’.

Burning Down The House: Hello? Right, there’s the music. I had an inkling this was going to be this. I’ve gone on record before saying that the Tom Jones version of this is one of my least favourite songs of all time. Musically I like this a little more, but vocally it’s horrendous. The music is all blippy blappy moonman stuff and that prevents the main melody from grating as much as the cover does. It doesn’t become repetitive, like the cover, as the music differs enough from one moment to the next but it’s still not something I’d need to hear again.

Making Flippy Floppy: Moonman fade in. Terrible beats and worse vocals. Now this one is repetitive. It sounds like a bad Prince song. At least the bass and instrumentation are sometimes interesting, but it sounds very dated. There’s a whole tonne of lyrics but from one I can pick up without studying, it sounds like random nonsense. Some sort of snaking solo in the middle, sounds nice but the drums ruin it. Nothing hear to make me want to listen again. I assume a lot of people will like to dance to this, and the lyrics give the appearance of intelligence so it’s okay for people who don’t like generic dance music to get into it. Could have a minute shaved off and not lose anything.

Girlfriend Is Better: Listen – the whole 80s synthesized drums thing has always been a problem for me. I’ve never liked it, and I still don’t. That funky staccato guitar is almost identical in every song so far. The vocals are never going to be for me. A lot of the other musical stuff going on is okay, but the songs themselves and the lead melodies don’t deserve the pieces that I do enjoy. In other words, the songs are crap but there are little pieces int he background which should have been cut and paste into a better song. Once again, if I was off my face and dancing this would be fine, but then someone’s vomit hitting the bowl is enough to make me dance when I’m off my face. Haven’t the time or patience to study the lyrics but they seem the most interesting part. In summary – bits I like, but not enough.

Slippery People: The drums are better in this so far. More blips and blaps. The the same guitar. Then the same vocals. I can’t really say ask to replace the vocals and guitar, and in most cases the drums, because then it would be a completely different band apart from the one everyone else seems to love. Backing vocals spice things up a bit, but unfortunate the whole thing is so monotone. That’s always one of the issues I had with a lot of punk – the lack of vocal melody – but at least it was backed up by sheer force or emotion. This has plenty of groovy backing musical parts which are nice – probably my favourite song so far but that’s hardly saying a lot. I guess I’m interested in what sort of person really loves this. Plenty of people in the comments on Youtube are proclaiming each song as the best ever (standard for any video), but I can’t see your standard punk person getting it. Post-punk yeah, but post-punk rarely works for me, people who like pop and dance stuff I would guess this is too strange for them. For me, it’s both not strange enough, lacks emotion, lacks melody, and it’s too repetitive.

I Get Wild/Wild Gravity: Here come the bad drum sounds. Same guitar, but with echo effects. Sounds like something from a Karate Kid knock-off. I’d appreciate this more if I could see it freaking more people out. I love weird for the sake of weird, but it only works for me when it’s either a complete failure or no-one cares. When it tries to hard to be offbeat and ends up sounding just like everything else, but with a slight twist, then it doesn’t work for me. I think that’s part of the issue with this band and me. It’s commercially weird. It’s not buck nuts. That and the repetition and ‘fake’ nature of the music kills it for me. And the melodies just pass over me like they’re not there.

Swamp: Actually, I’m thankful this is only nine songs. This intro reminds me of one of Rod Stewart’s 80s songs. You know, that one where he’s walking towards the camera with his sleeves up. That’s probably all of them, but anyway. Different vocals and different guitar this time. Still no melodies worth mentioning. It’s funny how all the Youtube comments on these songs are like a secret club It’s funny how those comments are more interesting than the songs. Hand clap drums are the spawn of Putin. The vocals remind me somewhat of Bowie – there’s a range but the execution leaves a lot to be desired. For me, I qualify again. You like them, good for you, but they’re not for me. I like my vocals to be ripped from the guts of Hell.

Moon Rocks: Reggae start? Hope not, because that shit rarely flies with me. Why is every song 5.45? Is that intentional? It’s certainly funky, but I don’t think the vocals fit. The music keeps being more interesting than the melodies. The jangled guitars are back. Nice bass going on. Some sort of moonman interlude. Messing in the studio. Making noise from nothing. This one is so overtly funky that it’s hard to not get down. Probably the best one so far, benefits from the occasional melodic turn. Is there enough for me to care?

Pull Up The Roots: More hand clap beats. Come on – how did know one hear this and immediately think it was a terrible idea? Here come the vocals, all over the place again. Better melody for chorus. More Youtube comments saying how ‘normal’ people won’t get it. That’s just what I’ve been saying. It’s not weird or unusual. If you’re enjoying it and blasting it from your car, it isn’t weird enough, it’s 100% normal. It’s not the vocal style of most bands, but that doesn’t mean normal people don’t get it as much as it means it’s not good. And many many vocalists from the era adopted this style – not sure if this was first but Bowie was at it long before this was released. The best thing I can say is that it is funky or you can dance to it. I rarely consider a song’s ability to make you want to dance as a compliment. A better compliment would be that something like this would never chart today, because everything is so bland – credit for not being bland, but I’d never consider it weird.

This Must Be The Place: It’s just… it sounds so weak. I know I’m a metal and rock fan and am used to songs existing solely to blow my head off, but that’s not all I listen to. I listen to plenty of gentle music in traditionally softer genres, but even those feel more vibrant and energetic than this – not weak. Maybe it’s the artificiality of it. I don’t know. It sounds like standard middle of the road pop to me. Maybe because it’s my first and only listen, but this song just blends in with the others and doesn’t stand out. I know it’s different and even has a different approach, but at this point in the album that central vibe is a plague. Criticism at its best, folks!

What Did I Learn: When people say punk I still immediately think of angry young people screaming over three minute guitar based songs, but there’s more to it. I’ve always known that, but I think this and a lot of other stuff got erroneously labelled punk too. It’s entirely something else, but if people have deemed it punk or post then fine. This was exactly the album and style and sound I anticipated it would be, and my feelings about the band haven’t changed. It’s a sound I don’t enjoy, though I can see why some people do. I don’t understand why it’s held in such high esteem even though I should be the target audience. To me it’s too weak, it’s not weird enough, it’s not as adventurous as it either thinks or as it once was, and the monotonous looping of it all keeps me at arm’s distance.

Do I Think It Should Be In The Top 1000 Albums Of All Time: My opinion is an easy no. To me it sounds like every other Talking Heads work I’ve ever heard and sounds a hell of a lot like many other 80s bands. That sound is so ingrained that it could be a one-hit wonder act or an established artist or Talking Heads – too similar. Of course I’m aware I’m missing most of the nuances which come with dedicated listens and familiarity, but these posts are all about first time, one time listens. I can’t say how influential this was over any other Talking Heads album but Wikipedia tells me this is their fifth so I can only assume their earlier stuff was more influential? There’s not enough I’ve enjoyed here to spur me on to investigate further, but if you’re a fan fill me in in the comments. As is increasingly the case with these albums, I feel like I should apologise for not liking it and if any fans are reading this they’re probably frothing at the beak at how fucking stupid I am for not getting it. You like it? Great. Not for me. Did I say that already? It’s better than most modern chart stuff, I’ll give it some credit.

Colin Larkin’s Ranking: 965/1000

Let us know in the comments what you think of Speaking In Tongues!

Nightman Listen’s To – Harvest Moon – Neil Young (Top 1000 Series)

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Greetings, Glancers! Another day, another album to expose myself to. Yes, as I sit here completely bollock naked in front of my screen, I am ready to absorb some good tunes into my many orifices.

What Do I Know About Neil Young: All the grunge kids liked him. All the grunge bands too. As a grunge kid myself, I’m sort of surprised it’s taken me this long to get here. I’ve heard some of his stuff, I know he’s experimented with a variety of styles, but I’ve never sat down and listened to a single album. Naked or otherwise.

What Do I Know About Harvest Moon: It’s a series of games which merge farming simulator with RPG and dating antics, played at a gentle pace yet oddly addictive. Heh, you saw that one coming, right? I’ve been aware of the album for a long time and I’m surprised Larkin didn’t have it higher on his list given that other critics seems to rate it higher.

Unknown Legend: I like the main riff, but I’m immediately on guard because it sounds country. You know I can’t stand country music. The lyrics, the way they rhyme sounds very forced and overly simple. Musically simple, nevertheless there are dynamic qualities like the female backing vocals in the chorus. The lead vocals aren’t great but I was kind of prepared for that..that country guitar though…. nothing will ever convince me that it it’s good, and I’m not a huge harmonica fan either.

From Hank To Hendrix: Doesn’t bode well starting out with harmonica and the exact same rhythm as the first song. I do appreciate the laid back nature but I get the sense this is essentially a period piece from a specific time in the USA which means nothing to me – I wasn’t there, though it’s nothing like what I remember of the era – grunge. I like the effects on the harmonica, giving some sort of twisted futuristic feel to what is at its core an old fashioned song. I think I could like this one a lot with additional listens, but I also think I could tire of it quite easily – maybe only one for a certain mood.

You And Me: The vocals…. I know what he’s going for, but it’s clearly not his range. This reminds me of The Wicker Man, which is always a good thing. This is nice, too repetitive for me, also reminds me of The Battle Of Evermore. 

Harvest Moon: Hmm, I believe I know this one. I was going to say it reminded me of Close To You. Yeah, I’ve definitely heard this before, but I don’t know from where, possibly a movie or a friend. I checked out the video for this, and it’s cheesy as hell – terrible. I’m still not a huge fan of the vocals, they do break at points and fall out of tune momentarily, though this doesn’t appear to be done for effect. It’s sweet and gentle, but comes a little close to being cloying and twee.

War Of Man: This also seems familiar. I enjoy when the beat picks up in the intro giving things a more stomping, urgent feel. I’m not paying much attention to the lyrics, but I’m guessing from the vocal refrain it’s anti-war. Actually, that’s not much of a guess, it’s 100% clear. The vocals are still weird, a mixture of tone and accent and delivery.

One Of These Days: The vocals are all over the place here, not good. More terrible pedal guitar which I can’t stand. There’s a good song in here, but I can’t get past the vocals and pedal both which verge on and often soar past dreadful.

Such A Woman: This is more encouraging, orchestral, piano, something different. The vocals are fairly deep in the mix here, almost being swamped by everything else, which is probably a good thing. I think I could love this song if there was a decent singer getting stuck in and wrenching out every last piece of the emotion, because the music is beautiful.

Old King: No no, country is one thing… weirdo country is another thing entirely.

Dreamin’ Man: Didn’t we hear this one already? Sounds very similar to one of the earlier songs on the album. Identical rhythm, almost identical chords. The album got, well, crap, very quickly after a decent start. Too many samey songs, too much country. This is just way too simple, way too boring.

Natural Beauty: Not sure why the album is ending with a ten minute live performance. Assuming this is a live version of an older song? He doesn’t sound any better live than he does in the studio… in fact, he sounds identical. This song also sounds almost identical ot something from earlier in the album, the melodies are heavily borrowed, that sloth rhythm is still lingering, and the old trick of backing female vocals was overplayed by the third song. How can you have a ten minute song where almost nothing happens – no change in pace, style, anything?

What Did I Learn: Not much… Neil Young can’t sing for shit and he loves country shit.

Does It Deserve To Be In The Top 1000 Albums Of All Time: I think you can guess what I’m going to say in summary – some good songs, but needs the country whacked out of them and needs a decent singer to take control of them. The album sounds like it was made in the 70s, but was actually recorded in the nineties, so it can’t have had much influence on anyone significant. All of that adds up to a resounding no, which is a shame as I think this had potential to be much better than it is.

Let us know in the comments what you think of Harvest Moon!

Nightman Listens To – The Style Council – Our Favourite Shop (Top 1000 Series)!

When I started writing this series of Listens To! posts, my idea was to:

A: Listen to the tonnes of albums I have acquired over the years that I hadn’t bothered to actually listen to yet and give my thoughts as I listened for the first time.

B: Catch up on those artists that I was aware of/liked certain songs by, but whose albums I had never listened to in their entirety.

C: Potentially get some new favourites based off what I heard or by recommendations from my billions of readers.

D: Because there are a tonne of albums which always appear on best of lists which I have never heard.

As a musician, music fan, and human with working ears, I feel that I should give these a go. To get some focus, I decided to go to 2000 Edition of ‘Colin Larkin’s All Time Top 1000 Albums’ because it looks fairly comprehensive (and there are a few extra sections listing top 100 albums by genre which cover selections left out of the main 1000 which I will also try to cover).

When I started writing this series of Listens To! posts, my idea was to:

A: Listen to the tonnes of albums I have acquired over the years that I hadn’t bothered to actually listen to yet and give my thoughts as I listened for the first time.

B: Catch up on those artists that I was aware of/liked certain songs by, but whose albums I had never listened to in their entirety.

C: Potentially get some new favourites based off what I heard or by recommendations from my billions of readers.

D: Because there are a tonne of albums which always appear on best of lists which I have never heard.

As a musician, music fan, and human with working ears, I feel that I should give these a go. To get some focus, I decided to go to 2000 Edition of ‘Colin Larkin’s All Time Top 1000 Albums’ because it looks fairly comprehensive (and there are a few extra sections listing top 100 albums by genre which cover selections left out of the main 1000 which I will also try to cover).

When I started writing this series of Listens To! posts, my idea was to:

A: Listen to the tonnes of albums I have acquired over the years that I hadn’t bothered to actually listen to yet and give my thoughts as I listened for the first time.

B: Catch up on those artists that I was aware of/liked certain songs by, but whose albums I had never listened to in their entirety.

C: Potentially get some new favourites based off what I heard or by recommendations from my billions of readers.

D: Because there are a tonne of albums which always appear on best of lists which I have never heard.

As a musician, music fan, and human with working ears, I feel that I should give these a go. To get some focus, I decided to go to 2000 Edition of ‘Colin Larkin’s All Time Top 1000 Albums’ because it looks fairly comprehensive (and there are a few extra sections listing top 100 albums by genre which cover selections left out of the main 1000 which I will also try to cover).

When I started writing this series of Listens To! posts, my idea was to:

A: Listen to the tonnes of albums I have acquired over the years that I hadn’t bothered to actually listen to yet and give my thoughts as I listened for the first time.

B: Catch up on those artists that I was aware of/liked certain songs by, but whose albums I had never listened to in their entirety.

C: Potentially get some new favourites based off what I heard or by recommendations from my billions of readers.

D: Because there are a tonne of albums which always appear on best of lists which I have never heard.

As a musician, music fan, and human with working ears, I feel that I should give these a go. To get some focus, I decided to go to 2000 Edition of ‘Colin Larkin’s All Time Top 1000 Albums’ because it looks fairly comprehensive (and there are a few extra sections listing top 100 albums by genre which cover selections left out of the main 1000 which I will also try to cover).

When

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Greetings, Glancers! Once more it’s time for me to broaden my horizons by listening to one of the greatest albums of all time. It’s fair to say that I haven’t been overwhelmed in my journey thus far – while there have been good moments, great moments, most of what I have listened to hasn’t been my cup of tea. Add to that fact the other fact that I hate tea. And coffee. Someone needs to ban that shit.

What Do I Know About The Style Council: Absolutely nothing. Although, something way back in the darkest recesses of my mind a little voice is squeaking ‘aren’t they one of those ‘orrible ska bands’. And oh crap, yeah, that does sound familiar. I have a vision of a pack of douches in hats playing ‘orrible ska. I really hope I’m wrong about this, because if there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s ska. I’ve definitely heard the name, but I can’t connect the dots.

What Do I Know About Our Favourite Shop: They say never judge a book by its cover. When it comes to people, in many cases that metaphor is apt. When it comes to books, in most cases the metaphor is shit – if you don’t like the cover, you probably won’t like the book. When it comes to music, I find that if a band has a name, or if an album has a name that rubs me the wrong way, then nine times out of ten I won’t like said band or album. Having said all of that, this is a terrible name, or at least it’s one which does rub me the wrong way. Couple that with my ska concern, and not one part of any of this sounds promising. Oh God.

Homebreakers: Well, the second I visited youtube to listen to this, the game was up as I recognised Paul Weller. So that’s where I know the name from, suddenly it all fits. For the most part I like Paul Weller, in my limited listening of his work with The Jam, though sometimes he does veer awfully close to some of the ska punk bands…. Anyway… this opens with some Tube Station stuff. It’s a decent intro which suddenly becomes worrying when the brass comes in – brass equals Ska. I’ve probably mentioned it before, but I can count on a very few fingers the songs where brass is added that I’ve enjoyed. This is all quite funky, though it does feel very 80s. It’s certainly jazz infused, what with the horns and backing vocals – not a huge fan of the main vocal work or the melodies, but I could get used to the melding of styles.

All Gone Away: This for some reason reminds me of The Beautiful South – another of my most hated things. On the flip side it also reminds me stylistically and lyrically of Joni Mitchell, which is a much better thing. This is very… cute? I won’t go so far as calling it twee, but it’s nice, less depth than the first song musically, but I prefer the vocals and melodies. It could be the satirical intro to some twisted sitcom.

Come To Milton Keynes: I’d rather not. More organ, again which screams ska. There’s something lazy and sunny about the songs so far which keeps making me think of cheesy sitcoms or Caribbean beaches. The rhythm of the songs so far is very similar to each other which makes the vocals feel samey. There’s a nice middle section here to break things up, but I already know if this rhythm doesn’t change up in future songs I’ll get irritated before long. Now an unnecessary, but thankfully brief spoken part.

Internationalists: Great drum bombast gives way to funky guitar and stupid horns. A more hectic pace. Nifty guitar work in the middle. This is marginally more to my tastes. Still very 80s.

A Stones Throw Away: This starts wonderfully – give strings a chance to shine and I’ll be in love. This sounds familiar, actually – both reminding me of The Smiths, The Beatles, and making me question if I’ve heard it before. I am noticing the subtle and less subtle political lyrics. Great vocals this time, and the melodies blend with the strings. This was bloody fantastic.

The Stand Up Comic’s Instructions: They’re not going to, are they? Is that Lenny Henry? Yes. Talking, near rapping over some funky jazzy wank. Mostly this reminds me of The Wall. More political stuff. I’m surprised a bunch of idiots haven’t commented here calling this lefty PC Commie cuck agendist leftist crap. Yeah, idiots.

Boy Who Cried Wolf: This feels unusually sexy. A more straightforward pop song, and while I haven’t paid attention to the lyrics this time it sounds more like a love song of sorts. I can see the influence of this in a lot of later R’n’B. Mostly very nice.

A Man Of Great Promise: Church bells always depress me or put me on edge. A bunch of these songs make me think of another 80s band, but I can’t quite place it. Musically this is lovely again, not quite enough to make me seek it out again, but good enough for me to recommend it and not mind hearing it more. Lyrically it sounds like a dedication… I assume Paul’s not singing about himself.

Down In The Seine: Come on, I know I’ve heard this somewhere. I have no clue where, but this is definitely familiar. I’m still getting vibes of all the aforementioned bands. Now French vocals, now accordion. Good stuff again, the album getting stronger after a stumbling start.

The Lodgers: Ah, nice vocal intro. Breaks away into more 80s Floyd funk. Good lyrics, great rhythm, I like the vocals, the melodies. I could do without the organ.I’m even getting a Michael Jackson vibe here. I’d like to say this is superb, but purely personal preference holds me back from saying it. But it is very good. Thank God it’s not what I thought.

Luck: I don’t feel this one as much, though admittedly I was reading something about some Instagram bin-lid going on a racist rant about Martin Luther King while listening. This is quite poppy, what with all the vocal waverings going on. It’s fine, summery. This time it reminds me of both Phil Collins and Cartoone.

With Everything To Lose: Another merging the male and female vocals. Reminds me of Spanish holidays. That rhythm is back. This one’s just okay for me, not as strong as the ones I’ve called out as enjoying.

Our Favourite Shop: That sounds like one of the instruments I used to select on my dad’s old keyboard – like the keyboard version of a bass guitar. Still, it’s funky, there’s some funky organ, some sort of cowbell, piano, and… is this all an instrumental? You probably know my feelings on instrumentals – they have to be truly exceptional or exceedingly hooky to get me listening more than a few times. This is neither, but it ain’t ‘alf bad, guv. Pretty ballsy to name your album after an instrumental track, I guess.

Walls Come Tumbling Down!: I feel like this would have worked better if it had properly merged with the song before. Bowie vocals. Lady vocals too. Full disclosure. It’s a few weeks between listening to this song and listening to the previous tracks and this feels very similar to one I’ve already heard. Nevertheless, I like it well enough and wouldn’t switch channel or song if it came on. Can’t say I’d go searching for it though.

What Did I Learn: That The Style Council is not a Ska band and features Paul Weller. That I liked it more than I thought I would. That judging a book by its cover, or a band by their name is perfectly acceptable – as long as you have a few other facts to help.

Does It Deserve To Be In The Top 1000 Albums Of All Time: I liked it more often than not, but that’s not nearly enough for me to say it deserves a spot. I can tell at a high level it had an influence on later groups, but those groups would tend to be ones I don’t like or listen to much. I can’t give any good reason why it shouldn’t be included, so I fall on a maybe for this one.

Colin Larkin’s Ranking: 706/1000

Let us know in the comments what you thought of The Style Council’s ‘Our Favourite Shop’ and if it’s in your list of favourites!

Nightman Listens To – Blood, Sweat, And Tears (Top 1000 Series)!

Blood, Sweat, And Tears – are they a spin off of Earth, Wind, And Fire? Nobody knows. One thing is for sure, it has been blood, sweat, and tears listening to some of these so-called best albums ever. Hilarious! Now that the shite is out of the way, I’ll be honest and say I don’t know anything this band or album and I’m not sure I’ve even heard of them. That should make the next piece easy…

What Do I Know About Blood, Sweat, And Tears (band): Nowt

What Do I Know About Blood, Sweat, And Tears (album): Less than nowt.

Lets go.. the tracklisting doesn’t fill me with confidence but as the timeless saying goes ‘don’t judge a song by its shitty name’.

Variations On A Theme: Soft. Flutey, guitary. Quite nice. Feels like I’ve heard this before, once upon a dream. That it? Twinkles.

Smiling Phases: Jazz explosion. Organ. Drums. Funky. Vocals like Baywatch. Chaotic. Drum collapse. Good piano in middle. Lots of shifts. I actually typed ‘lots of shits’ first. It’s all over the place now, but just clinging on – I can dig this amount of jazz. Not much brass so far, so I’m good. Here come da brass. Regal. Back to vocals. Slowing. Drum disaster. End.

Sometimes In Winter: More standard soft jazz into. The flutey stuff gives it a smoother edge which I prefer. Not sure about the vocals, not very exciting or expressive – then I’m not a fan of smooth vocals. This is okay, a little plain, would be served better by a different singer. Some nice parts, lyrics better than vocals, but average all round.

More And More: Trumps. Funky. James Brown. Vocals okay. This has a harder edge, no doubt influenced by the rock of the era. Drum breakdown. Guitar jump scare. Lots of screams. See, again I can enjoy this level of jazz because its so infused with other styles. Sudden end.

And When I Die: Harmonica. Then turns into a jaunty circus pirate song. Faster. Tempo bouncing around. Funny organ. More. Yee ha. Happy songs about dying are probably hard to come by. Slower. Faster. Slower. Faster. End.

God Bless The Child: Slower. Swing. Too many trumpets. Religion. Everyone has covered this. Still not convinced by the vocals. Too slow and dreary for me. Piano shift. Foot tapping time. Turned into a completely different song. Crazy trump solo. More brass. Back to slow and harmonica. End.

Spinning Wheel: Honk in. Pretty sure I’ve heard this before. Vocals better again when gruff. Superman. Fart Trump. As commercial as such a mixture could possibly be. Flute weirdo moment. Going A Day In The Life. Laughs.

You’ve Made Me So Very Happy: More dodgy vocals. Whispery organ and sudden trump blasts. He’s better on the big notes. Not bad, just not my style. Seems a little cheesy, but the edge keeps it on the straight and narrow. More organ bits. The mix of jazz and funk and rock somehow works.

Blues Part II: 12 minutes, eh? Lets be havin’ ya. Organ, obviously, you’ve gots to start a 12 minute song with some organ. Tune’s struggling to come through. Meandering for now. Tune now. Ascending. Swirling. Faster. Where’s the beat. Trumpet disaster. Now beat. Bass. Very loose. Drums. Everyone’s getting a turn. Brass and bass. It goes on. And On. Sunshine Of My Love. Vocals.

Variations On A Theme: Is this the same thing again? Sure sounds like it.

What Did I Think: So, I see now that this was actually mostly a covers album, or at least features several covers.  That explains why some parts seemed familiar. Looking down the page on Wikipedia I see that a few of the songs were either outright covers or included some piece written by someone else. I’m not overly familiar with any of the originals so I can’t speak for how they have been adapted and translated. In the end though, I mostly liked it – no-one is more surprised than I am. It’s not something I see myself ever coming back to, but I enjoyed the energy. I do think the vocals could have done with a shake up, but that’s just me.

Does It Deserve A Place On The Top 1000 Albums of All Time: It’s another instance of the album not being immediately amazing to me to justify its inclusion, yet not obviously bad or average enough to cast it down outright. I can’t imagine this being massively influential – at least from a long-lasting perspective, but I can understand why it was a hit and is highly regarded. Not my thing, but when I can still enjoy something that is not my thing, then it must be doing something right.

Let us know in the comments if you have any particular love for Blood, Sweat, And Tears, and if you have any special memories attached to it.

Nightman Listens To – My Fair Lady – Original Broadway Cast (Top 1000 Albums Series)

Oh, dear Lord, no. This is one giant WTF and should not be on a Top 1000 Albums list. Yes, yes, I haven’t heard it yet, but I already know what it’s going to sound like. I’ve seen the movie, hell, I even kind of like the movie. But musicals, in general, suck balls while simultaneously sucking the life out of me. Musicals… you’re lucky if you get two or three good songs, usually at least one centrepiece. My Fair Lady, as far as movie musicals go, has a few songs which the general public will know even if they haven’t seen the movie, but none of the songs are outstanding. Lets just get this over with.

What Do I Know About My Fair Lady: Musical, based off book, which later became a hit movie. Audrey Hepburn is awesome. She’s not here though.

Overture: It’s frantic and fast. It’s a textbook overture. You already know what you’re getting here. There’s about four seconds here to differentiate it from any other musical.

Why Can’t The English: Ridiculous talky singy. There’s only person who should be murdered here, and it’s YOU. This is just an embarrassment for all concerned. Fine in a film musical – pure torment in literally any other form.

Wouldn’t It Be Loverly: Starts horrifically. Gets gradually worse. At least this one has a memorable main line. The backing vocals are shocking. Some of Julie Andrews’ notes are ear cancer too.

With A Little Bit Of Luck: One of the things I hate most about musicals is singing with forced accents. Which means I’m basically buggered where this album is concerned. It’s so false and theatrical – I want my music, in most cases, to be honest, not acting. Of course, this is a musical so I get it’s meant to be the other way around – but as I’m listening with no visuals it just doesn’t work. The song needs to be extraordinary to get its point across. This is tripe. As far as accents go, Cockney is near the top of the list of ones I can’t abide. YOU SOUND LIKE A COCK.

I’m An Ordinary Man: More talking. I don’t care. You may as well be describing the peristalsis which occurs in your anus as your squeeze one through. Posh rapping. Women, eh, amirite? You’d prefer the Spanish Inquisition to letting a woman into your life? Hardy har. I’d prefer you and everyone you’ve ever met being skinned and set on fire than listen to this for another millisecond.

Just You Wait: Oh fuck off.

The Rain In Spain: Abortion.

I Could Have Danced All Night: I don’t mind the ‘chorus’ of this one. All else is pain and two minutes too long.

Ascot Gavotte: Noises. Marching. Then the singing starts and we all wish we were dead.

On The Street Where You Live: This one would be fine without the terrible vocals.

You Did It: Nice flutey opening descends into farce. And not good farce. The sort of farce where you’re trying to get somewhere on time but you can’t find your keys, then the car won’t start, then you get stuck behind eight cyclists who CYCLE IN A GROUP BESIDE THE FUCKING CYCLE LANE, then you get by them only to meet a tractor, before an ISIS appears in the backseat and beheads you.

Show Me: More travesties.

Get Me To The Church: Nope.

A Hymn To Him: Unlistenable.

Without You: Every single song and every single vocal delivery is identical.

I’ve Grown Accustomed To Her Face: Starts with ridiculous aplomb. It’s all words words words spoken in the same dumb way. Once we finally get to the ‘good’ bit it’s too little too late.

What Did I Learn: I’m fairly competent that several thousands brain cells died while listening to this.

Does It Deserve Its Place In The Top 1000 Albums Of All Time: Are you seriously asking me that with a straight face? Every copy of this wank should be wiped from existence.

Colin Larkin’s Ranking: 559.

Yeah, don’t even comment. In fact, forget I even mentioned it.

Nightman Listens To – Blur – Blur (Top 1000 Albums Series)

When I started writing this series of Listens To! posts, my idea was to: A: Listen to the tonnes of albums I have acquired over the years that I hadn’t bothered to actually listen to yet and give my thoughts as I listened for the first time. B: Catch up on those artists that I was aware of/liked certain songs by, but whose albums I had never listened to in their entirety. C: Potentially get some new favourites based off what I heard or by recommendations from my billions of readers. D: Because there are a tonne of albums which always appear on best of lists which I have never heard. As a musician, music fan, and human with working ears, I feel that I should give these a go. To get some focus, I decided to go to 2000 Edition of ‘Colin Larkin’s All Time Top 1000 Albums’ because it looks fairly comprehensive (and there are a few extra sections listing top 100 albums by genre which cover selections left out of the main 1000 which I will also try to cover).

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Greetings, glancers. Today we return to Colin Larkin’s Top 1000 albums and our first Blur entry. I’m hopeful that I’ll enjoy this one as by and large I’ve liked what I’ve heard over the years from Blur and they are a pretty large missing piece from my musical knowledge, outside of their biggest songs. I just hope the accents don’t annoy me.

What I Know About Blur (Band): Britpop darlings, massively successful, one half of the infamous Oasis versus Blur Civil War in the 90s, built around Coxon, James, Albarn, and probably another one. I know most of their singles pretty well, but I’ve never owned or heard any of their albums in full. I was always on the Oasis side of the argument. Something about Blur in the early days seemed too cheery, too happy and silly, and Damon’s face and singing style/voice annoyed me. Later songs I enjoyed more and the band grew on me, but still I never actually went back to listen to any albums.

What I Know About Blur (Album): Nothing, I wasn’t even aware they had a self-titled album. I would have assumed this was their debut, until I saw that it wasn’t. Looking down the track list I recognise, and like, two of the songs, but aside from that I don’t know anything else about the album.

Beetlebum: Has a short scratchy intro before the famous distorted riff comes in. The vocals and melodies have a Beatles feel, a drowsy post-grunge appeal with an exuberant melancholy pop chorus. I’ve always liked this one.

Song 2: This one everyone knows. I remember mocking and appreciating the Smells Like Teen Spirit stylings of the song when it was first released, and the song has continued to hold worldwide popularity, always popping up some movie or TV show. Good start to the album, but that’s the two songs I recognise out of the way.

Country Sad Ballad Man: Another scratchy opening. Twangs and drums. Eventual tune. Distant vocals. Weirdo vocals. More droopy, sleepy vibes. Interesting enough. Solo with unrelated string bending. Alien noises. Explosion. Wasp trapped in an eye socket. Flipping a pancake into a toilet.

MOR: Nice guitars. Building. Bowie vocals. Chorus. It’s certainly loud and bouncy. The vocals and singing accent don’t do it for me. Chorus is okay, I’d say after a few listens of this this would either completely piss me off or finally click with me, not sure which but I’m veering towards being pissed off.

On Your Own: Spaceman intro. WipEout. Robots eating and crapping guitars. More Bowie vocals. ‘Ooooh-ooooh’ harmonies. It’s all a bit too drunken and chanty for my liking, one to sway about to with ‘the lads’ as you fall out of ‘the’ pub. ”.

Theme From Retro: Throb in. Drums. Circus funeral. Ghosts bobbing for apples. This is just one big Bowie wank fest, innit?

You’re So Great: Better start. Basic stuff at a pleasing tempo. Vocals not quite right of course. Nice bonus guitar. Rinse and repeat.

Death Of A Party: More distortion and organ mishaps. Okay verses, more drowsiness. Chorus is better but misses a trick by not going on for another few moments, another line and another progression from ‘gently on the shelf’. It goes on for another verse, then goes on a bit more, then stops.

Chinese Bombs: Faster guitars. Drum disaster. Clearly a joke song, but it’s better than most of their serious ones on this album.

I’m Just A Killer For Your Love: Funk. Drum mess. Scratchy guitars, why not. More drowsy verses and chorus. Getting sleepy. More noises for the second half of the song. Sounds like a bunch of knobs let loose in a studio for a few hours with no idea what they’re doing.

Look Inside America: Another acoustic start. Big vocals. Strings bonus. Rest of band appears. Bowie chorus. Can’t shake off those drowsy tones and melodies. There are a few good moments here, but outweighed by the guff. Surprise harp and guitar ending. Because we haven’t had a song with a harp on it yet.

Strange news From Another Star: Continuing the loose tonal theme. Change to acoustic, much better. Good verses, lets hope it doesn’t get thrown away. Much better chorus, still drowsy, still Bowie, but keeps the best moments of both. Easily the best song since the 2nd track. Even gets the ending right.

Movin On: Good intro. Jaunty riffs. Fun enough, doesn’t go anywhere but not too offensive. Comedy ending.

Essex Dogs: Apparently this includes ‘Interlude’. That should be good. Throbbing. Tin cans. Like an old Spectrum racing game. Words. Is it about Essex? I’ve no idea, but I know I never want to go there. Guitars and lasers. More words. Distant singing and bass. Robot orgy. Bits and pieces. It’s fine, works well as an experimental piece. Here come Interlude. It’s okay too, repeating the same weirdo sounds.

Colin Larkin’s Ranking: 271/1000

What I Learned: That the first Blur album I listened to contained far fewer pop and commercial songs than I was expecting. That singing in your speaking accent will always annoy me, especially when it’s wanky posh English. That Blur tried to experiment and, well, failed.

Does It Deserve A Place In The Top 1000 Albums Of All Time: Not in my opinion, no. I understand now, after reading some of the album’s wiki page that this was a departure for the band in almost all departments. It seems like a strained attempt at a magnum opus, of being something they were not, or at least had not been. They tried, but it doesn’t work for me. There are maybe three or four songs here I’d gladly hear again, with another one or two being passable, but the rest is pretension by a group who don’t appear to have the skills to be pretentious.

Is this your favourite album? Do you think it deserves a place in the Top 1000 Albums of all time? Let us know in the comments!