Amazon Vine – April 2016

After a rough start to the year, where the Vine Gods sought to abandon me in the wilderness for 90 days and nights with only Staplers to keep me company, April rolled around and brought with it fresh hope and new items to clasp around my self.

Philips FC6168/62 2-in-1 Upright and Hand Held Cordless Vacuum Cleaner, Pet Hair and Anti-Allergen

It sucks up pet hair… and Allergens!


A book about Witches and Dutch people and stupid people. It’s pretty good.

Kazooloo DMX Board Game

An Augmented Reality game not starring everyone’s favourite rapper turned ex-rapper DMX, Kazooloo is really rather terrible.

Lux High Protein Flapjack

They taste exactly like you’d imagine – like the suddenly prolapsed sphincter of a sleeve-tattoo adorned try-hard who spends more time looking in the mirror than a Wicked Fairytale Queen.

Thoughts? Share!

Amazon Vine Freebies – November 2015

A dirge for November, or a deluge. Six freebies were cast down from the Vine Gods to land at my threshold, and I received them with thanks. Here they are.

A Hard Day:


A decent Chinese movie with plenty of intriguing action

El Nino:

A decent Spanish movie with plenty of intriguing action


Philips LED Spotlights – Twin Pack (GU10 4.5W) – White:


A decent pack of spotlights with plenty of luminous action

Verbatim 52602 LED Candle E14 4.5 Watt 350 lm Light Bulb:


A decent LED bulb with plenty of long-lasting action

BETA Adult Shepherds & Setters with Lamb Dry Dog Food, 12 kg:

A decent sack of food with plenty of chomping action

Philips Disney Frozen Children’s Projector Torch and Night Light (1 x 0.3 W Integrated LED):


A decent Disney torch with plenty of shadow figure action.

Amazon Vine Freebies – February 2013

Ask, and ye shall receive. In February I was hoping for an external hard drive and my current 1TB was bursting at the seems, and with the amount of baby pics being taken it wouldn’t be long before it exploded and sucked away my past like an inverted McFly/Timecop/Terminator/Hector 3 time-warping disaster.

Taking a split
You can go back in time all you want – you’ll never get this image out of your head

As seems to happen with Vine, when your really want and need something, they deliver. I’m still waiting on that 42 inch HD TV though, hint HINT.

Seagate Wireless Plus 1Tb Mobile Storage Device:

Fill me, big boy
Fill me, big boy

‘Having received a Kindle Fire from Santa I was looking forward to the post-Christmas-return-to-work-train-journey so that I could catch up on all the various films and TV shows I love. Previously, I streamed my lovefilm watchlist, but thanks to the almighty awfulness of the Translink NI wireless ‘strength’, even a 20 minute episode could transform into a Nightmare of X-Factor proportions. I would get maybe 20 seconds of viewing, followed by 3-4 minutes of buffering, then another few seconds viewing, repeat ad bokeium. The only choice is to let the thing buffer for ages at the start of my journey whilst I read or play on my DS or look at supermodels on the train or something, then watch when a decent blast of minutes has been prepared, and hope that the connection doesn’t vanish 12 seconds after pressing play. Then this boy arrived, with the memory capabilities of at least 14 Rain Men.
As Kindle owners will know, the internal storage isn’t great, and you’ll spend your life transferring over and deleting movies every week. This 1TB Wireless storage has everything you need if you have somehow suffered the bizarre adventures I have aforementioned. Set up is easy, in that there isn’t really one. Some have commented that the lack of instructions is infuriating – I assume this was done to cut down on packaging, and while there is a comprehensive guide online, a few pointers included in the box for the more important things such as how to password protect and how to use as an anti-spirit Proton Pack. A quick guide is available once you connect, so you shouldn’t have any worries.
The transfer speeds here are fast, so I was whipping between this, my Kindle, and my other Hard Drive like Indiana Jones at a Coconut Shy and before long I had moved everything I needed for many a month of train rides. This however did present a new issue – which media player to use (as you’ll likely have to download a few to play certain file formats). The format type isn’t the issue, the issue is that when I’m watching a film, it would be good if the media player remembered where I’d got to before switching off. This isn’t the biggest problem though, that would be that the media players I’ve used so far don’t let me grab the little ball at the bottom to scroll to where I left off- which means that I essentially have to watch the same stuff again to reach the point where I left off. Naturally I just need to find a better media player, so that’s not a problem with the device. The device is so far problem free- easy to use and charge, remarkably small and light, yet sturdy, has its own built own wi-fi, and it’s quiet. Get one now!’

On The Road:

Philips Avent Toddler Weaning Set:

Fill me up, big boy
Fill me up, big boy

Philips Comfort Single Breast Pump:

Fill me up, big lass
Fill me up, big lass

Marware Kindle Fire Cover:

‘A cheaper alternative to the official Kindle brand, this cover with stand for Kindle Fire does the same job, with a few pros and cons. The main Pro is the price- it’s cheaper than other brands, though not considerably so. You don’t need to worry about your Kindle Fire not fitting as this is as comfortable a squeeze as sitting between two supermodels on The Tube. The stand does what is expected of it whilst not being flimsy or making you anxious that it will fall over if a supermodel sneezes beside you whilst trapped beside her on The Tube. The cover includes slots for supposedly carrying money, credit cards, etc, although why anyone would choose to do this is beyond me – possibly keep something throwaway in there, like fake business cards for your imaginary supermodel agency to hand out to unsuspecting Tube travellers. The main con is that unlike the two covers for my other family Kindles, this one doesn’t close properly (though this may just be the one I have been sent). While my other covers slam and stay shut satisfactorily, this one flops open all the time, like a streaker’s coat on The Tube. This is a minor irritant whose properties of annoyance greatly increase when frantically trying to prise yourself out from between two supermodels, dart past the streaker, and leap off the train at your stop before the doors shut. On The Tube.’