Look! Look at the things! Sparkly and new and full of intrigue, like a child fresh over the fields on the first day of Summer, shoving their hand into a muddy hole in the ground and yanking out fistfuls of gem-encrusted spiders. Why are they there? What do they do? Why are they biting me? MUMMY!? That’s right, it’s time for more trailers!
If it looks like a horror and sounds like a horror – it’s probably a horror. This feels incredibly cheap, like a straight to DVD. Urban legends. Passively excusing evil. No no, of course a human couldn’t be that evil, it must be drugs or computer games or music or Satan. Still, as you know I actively excuse horror films for being terrible as long as there are some good kills and assorted scares and antics.This appears to be fairly generic even if it may have an interesting premise, but I’m all for a new horror icon to join the pantheon. Not 100% what’s going on in the trailer, but enough to get an audience of teens into the screenings I’m sure.
Things To Know: Based on a short story by Robert Damon Schneck the film follows a group of college students stalked by the titular supernatural entity who appears to be capable of possession.
Whos To Know: Directed by Stacy Title (The Last Supper) and featuring Doug Jones, Faye Dunaway, Carrie Ann Moss, and Douglas Smith.
Adrien Brody. Looking smug. Roped into a suspicious investigation. Sex. Beatings. Voyeur. Crowley. She’s psychologically clever you know? Ha ha, what a terrible line. Why are the pretty ones always insane? Glorious ball of fire. This is looking more and more like having the worst screenplay EVER. And the trailer basically tells the entire plot. Unless it’s a lie. IS IT A LIE!?
Things To Know: Based on a novel by Colin Harrison about a crime reporter who becomes embroiled in a weaving tale of mystery and blackmail.
Whos To Know: Directed by Brian DeCubellis and starring Adrien Brody, Jennifer Beals, and Yvonne Strahovski.
Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising (and bonus second trailer)
I thought this was called Bad Neighbors 2. I haven’t seen the first one yet but it looked amicable enough. Awkward (normal) sex. Normal (awkward) talking. Similar looking gags to what I saw in the trailer of the first. All fine and dandy, I’m sure I’d get some easy laughs out of this. And the cast is always watchable, even with Rogan’s laugh. Not gonna pay to go see it on the big screen though, think I’m made of money?
Things To Know: This sequel flips the scenario from the first film so that it is now a group of rambunctious girls causing trouble and strife.
Whos To Know: Directed again by Nicholas Stoller, and again starring Rogan, Byrne, Efron, and adding Moretz.
Oh dear. Sappy words and piano and the ravages of time. Man it’s gonna be awesome when everyone dies and comes back in the ghost dimension as the perfect versions of themselves and we don’t have to worry about looking too old or young or fat or thin or weird. Or something. Looks like a great cast. But looks like they not being put to good use. Crazy paranoid parents. Annoying detached kids. Such is life, peeps! We’re all dicks! Ha ha, men understand NOTHING and have NO PROBLEMS! This looks as patronizing and offensive as murdering a school of children and then blaming them for it. Oops. Steer clear, ladies. And everyone.
Things To Know: A films about mothers and daughters. A fine idea, but this looks to be entirely ghastly and filtered through an incredibly narrow middle class lens. Mermaids it ain’t.
Whos To Know: Directed by some bloke and some other bloke, and starring Stone, Sarandon, Ricci, Cox, Blair, Ashanti, probably others who already regret it.
Driving. Glances. Mansions. Binoche. Voyeur. Eyes. Stylish. Mystery. Vibe of Don’t Look Now. Tell her the truth. See, it isn’t difficult to make a trailer that doesn’t show a lot. Then again, maybe there isn’t anything to show. I’d need to know a bit more about this and hear some reviews before watching.
Things To Know: Also known as The Wait, this came out least year in various places, and sees a woman living with the fiancee of her son while hiding a secret.
Whos To Know: Directed by Piero Messina and starring Juliette Binoche and Lou De Laage.
Another selection of five movies for your enjoyment, so let us know in the comments which (if any) you are looking forward to. There’s at least three above I plan to catch at some point in the future, but none which leap out as a must see. What about you?
The Spac Hole 