Hilarious Translations Of Song Lyrics – August 2014 Part 1

Please note – the following hilarious translations are not the same as the equally hilarious misheard lyrics, nor are they actual translations currently out there in Pop Land. All I have done is taken a famous song and slapped the lyrics into one of the famous (ly bad) Internet Translation tools – translated from English into Korean, then back into English, with hilarious results. I picked Korean because, based on previous experience, it seems to struggle in the funniest way with the English language, and vice versa. Each week, I’m going to select some of the most famous songs of all times, of recent times, and throw in a few obscure favourites too, all for your enjoyment! Lets start the laughter right now!

That’s All Right, Mama.

For our first song we go al the back to one of songs that started it all. Arthur Crudup’ s Blues Rocker was sexual, up-tempo, and featured some early guitar God fingering (good night, everybody!). Once Elvis got a hold of it, the rest of the world caught right on. Let’s take a look at the original lyrics.

Well, now that’s all right, mama. That’s all right for you. That’s all right mama, anyway you do.

But, that’s all right, that’s all right. That’s all right now mama, anyway you do

Well mama, mama she done told me, Papa told me too. They love you leavin’ son now. We’ll be there for you

That’s all right, that’s all right. That’s all right now mama, anyway you do. Yeah man

Baby one and one is two, Two and two is four, I love that woman but I’ve to let her go

But, that’s all right, that’s all right, That’s all right now mama, anyway you do

Babe now you don’t want me, why not tell me so? You won’t be bothered with me ‘Round you have no more

But, that’s all right, that’s all right, That’s all right now mama, anyway you do.

The Translation:

Well, now, all right, Mom, It’s all right for you. In other words, whatever you do, love, mom

However, that‘s all right, that‘s all right. That is, after all, you’re all mothers now

Then she told me to do the mom Mom. Dad told me.They leave a son now loves. We‘ll be there for you

That is, all right, that‘s all right. That is, after all, you’re all mothers now
Four people, The baby one two, one 2 is a two to four. I love her, but I let her

However, that‘s all right, that‘s all right. That is, after all, you’re all mothers now

Lady you do not want to tell me now, why? You do not bother me. You are no more abnormal round

However, that‘s all right, that‘s all right. That is, after all, you’re all mothers now.

The WTF:
We seem to have turned a fairly simply tale of love, rejection, heartache, and passive aggressive acceptance into a monstrous tale about Oedipal lust and mental breakdown, one which will surely end in a women-hating, serial killing rampage. The almost passive tone of the original becomes immediately cynical with the opening couple of lines, ending with the ominous ‘You’re all mothers now’. That is the sound of a man who has made the conscious decision to see the face of his mother on every women he sees. What it is Mom did is left unclear, and could it be that there are actually two ‘Moms’? The narrator switches between ‘Mom’ and mom at will, and finally the moniker ‘Lady’ appears – clearly the narrator recognises that his next victim is not his mother, or that the mother he thought he knew is now foreign to him. But what to make of the centrepiece? Most of the song is the same few rambling, confused thoughts, but in the middle we get the clusterfuck ‘Four people, The baby one two, one 2 is a two to four. I love her, but I let her’. Who are the four people – son, Mom, mom, Dad? Who, or whose, is the baby? This is the point in the narrative process that our hero loses the plot and starts thinking in random, nonsensical equations. Perhaps we get close to some sort of reasoning with ‘I love her, but I let her’, but he stops short of explaining exactly what it is he let her do. This is a secret the man will take to the grave. And he seems quite keen to take a few more mothers with him before he blows himself away at the end of an exciting, probably naked, car chase.

Too Much Of A Good Thing.

I was praying we would get something light-hearted after that gristly ending when I hit shuffle on my iPod, but I landed on another tale of lost love, courtesy of The Sons. If any of you out there recognise this song, it’s because you heard it while watching Dumb And Dumber. One thing to note is that this song has some interesting lyrics, and poetically selected words that you would assume would not translate well between English and Korean. Under such circumstances, hilarity is bound to ensue. Here we go:

The Original:

There’s a chill in the air comin’ off the river tonight, Sure am glad I chose my sweater,
Walk alone, I walk alone tonight,Yeah, I’ve felt better.
But I know, in my heart, One car in an alley is better than a vacant lot,
And you’ll see, on my face,Lines on a young man can find their place.

Baby, I have left so much behind, Until I passed the same place twice
Now I see just what ya done to me, Too much of a good thing.

Can you hold the line,another call’s comin’ in, Might be the one I just got over,
Back and forth and up again, For just a wrong number.
But to scream a good cry, Could leave me naked in some stranger’s eyes,
So I’ll whisper, a little cry, Hope this memory’ll soon pass by. Ooh.

Baby, I got feelin’s old and strong, I did not think they’ll last this long, Tell me why your light keeps turnin’ on,
I say too much of a good thing. Too much of a good thing.

A lonely voice finds little demand, it turns too shy and afraid to make a stand.

For one last time can’t you listen to me, Baby don’t let me go silently

You’re too much, you’re too much. You’re too much of a good thing, You’re too much of a good thing, too much
Much too, much too, much too, much too, much too, much too, much too much, You’re too much of a good thing.

The Translation:

The chill is in the air coming off the night today river, Of course, I’m glad I choose the sweater
Walk alone, I walk alone at night, Yeah, well, I thought.
But in my mind, you know, The car is better than a vacant lot in the alley,
And you can see my face You can find their place in line to a young man.

Baby, it remains very much I until it passes the same place twice
Now, do me just what ya see The good thing is too much.

You can hold the line, Import of other currencies‘, I just got one that can be,
Maximum back and forth Just wrong.
But a good cry scream You leave me naked in the eyes of the stranger
So, I whispered a little cry, Please memory’ll passing quickly. Right.

Baby, I‘m an old strong feeling I did not think they‘d be able to last for so long,
Turn in the light of why do you say, I say too much of a good thing.
The good thing is too much.

The WTF:

Well, where to begin? Once again, the song takes a cynical turn – the original being more of an anguished cry of depression, and once again the narrator experiences severe bouts of confusion, mumbling over his words like a scarecrow brought to life by the blackest of magic, and then being fed magic mushrooms. To his credit, he starts of stable enough, glad he chose a sweater for a late night walk, but a glimpse of his mind shows that all is not well – ‘The car is better than a vacant lot in the alley‘. What precisely does he mean? Is this a literal statement, that a car is better than nothing? Did he see something which sparked this? Or is he thinking that a car is better than a vacant lot to perform some fell action? Whatever it is, he appears to make a swift exit as someone sees his face and he runs off. ‘Do me just what ya see’ – is this something you say to a prostitute, or something you say as a final act of defiance to a torturer? After this we get some bizarre talk of currency, screaming, nudity in front of strangers, and the haunting ‘Maximum back and forth Just wrong‘. The torture theme comes round and round again as the protagonist seems to have achieved a higher state of being – removing his spirit from his body yet not understanding why, or how ‘they’d be able to last for so long’. Who ‘they’ are, it may be best to not know.

In conclusion, my first two songs walked a much darker path to hilarity than I expected, and any laughs to be found therein are likely the laughs of a madman as he rises from behind your sofa, blade in one hand, and decapitated doll’s head on the other. Sweet dreams.

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