Friday The 13th Part VII: Jason Is Back- But Backer!

One, two: Jason’s coming for you! Three, four: he wants to settle a score! Five, Six: Get a bag of bricks. Seven, Eight: You’d better throw them straight. Nine, Ten: Kill him again and again. Eleven, Twenty Four: He’ll be back for more!

Thus goes the famous rhyme that the ghosts of all the children Jason Myers has killed sing. No-one ever pays heed to the important lyrics and lo and behold the big lumper is back! Taking over the baseball glove this time is WWE superstar Kane, replacing Giant Haystacks from previous instalments. This is a new chapter in the saga and was intended to reboot the franchise similar to how Batman Begins or Carry On Constable rebooted those franchises which I have just mentioned aforementionably. The characters are new, but Jason is the same except this time he’s different- bigger, stronger, tougher. The story focuses on Tina and her mum Nancy. Tina purposefully killed her father by mistake after he accidentally beat her mother on purpose. Tina you see has magic powers handed down by her granny, Carrie Bradshaw, who had a few years earlier went mental and murdered her entire school with fire and pig’s blood.

Flash forward a few years and Timmy is a bright, but disturbed and ripe teen. Her mom decides to take her to a Psychoticist who lives near Camp Krusty Lake to try and relieve her of her guilt. The doc hypnotises her which results in many scary images from her past springing out for her and us to see- her dad hitting her mum;  her dad hitting her duck; her dad hitting her her; her dad hitting her dad; Fonze on a jet ski. This proves too much for her and she runs out screaming. Her ‘mind scream’ as the doc refers to it is so strong that it brings Jason back to life. Jason quickly goes on a rampage in his quest to find and thank the one who woke him. If Tina had just accepted his gratitude at the start then the gore, guts, smashed heads, pierced necks, broken limbs, burned bodies, seared flesh, gouged livers, eaten hearts, swung intestines, scratched knees, bruised lips, and exposed breasts that followed could have been avoided. But then we wouldn’t have our film! Mr Mewes does his stuff better than the previous films, though I think he’s better in parts one to V,parts X- R, as well as 6. Overall this film is a film full of scared bits, some nice blood, and plenty of killings. Splendid show!

Best Scene: When Billy wakes up to find Jason in the sleeping bag beside him. The camera cuts to outside the bag and we see shot after shot of Jason’s sword pumping up and down through the bag, screams and blood filling the screen. Then we pan up to the top bunk and see two other teens doing the dirtiness without hearing what is happening beneath them. We know they’re next!

Jason Takes Manhattin..Manhattun?

Tell it like it is!

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